The Porch Pot
Experience

Luxury, locally sourced. Fine dining, curated activities, and a spa—all within walking distance of your couch.

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Our Story

What is Porch Pot?

Porch Pot is a boutique experience company specializing in thoroughly over-planned date nights, Valentine's Day adventures, and birthday surprises.

Our services are highly personalized, delivered by a dedicated team of two (one human, one dog), and operate out of a world-class facility that is technically our house.

Each experience is researched, reserved, and executed with the kind of effort you'd expect from a real business—because this is a real business.

3
Staff Members
1
Client
100%
Satisfaction

Porch Pot Spas

Est. 2024

Our Team

Meet the Staff

Richard
Charles
Frank
Learn More

Your Porch Pot Experience

Receive your invite link, choose your preferences, and we'll handle everything else. You just show up.

💌

You receive an email

A personal invite arrives in your inbox with a secure link just for you. No login required, no fuss—just open and go.

✨

Choose your adventure

Pick your lunch spot, an activity, dinner, and what comes after. Every option has been hand-picked so there's no wrong answer.

📅

Pick when

Select the date that works for you and we'll handle every reservation, every detail, and every surprise. You just show up.

What We Offer

Featured Packages

Hand-crafted experiences for the person who deserves it most. Presented below with just enough detail to be intriguing, and not so much that it ruins the surprise.

🌿
Relaxation

The Spa Night

A full evening of spa-grade relaxation. Think: candles, steam, warm towels, and music carefully selected to block out the neighbor’s dog. Not our dog. Our dog is perfect.

INCLUDES DINNER • 1 EVENING • FULLY MANAGED

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🌹
Most Popular

Valentine’s Experience

Our flagship offering. Lunch, an activity, dinner, and a post-dinner activity—all chosen by you, all executed by us. Romantic but not embarrassing. Probably.

MULTI-COURSE • FULL DAY • CHOOSE YOUR OWN ADVENTURE

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🎂
Celebration

Birthday Surprise

For when a birthday deserves more than a card and a very sincere text message. We’ll plan the evening. You bring the birthday person. Frank will provide moral support.

INCLUDES CAKE • FULL EVENING • SURPRISES MANDATORY

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🍷
Romance

Date Night

A classic evening done properly. Dinner, ambiance, and just enough planning that it doesn’t feel like a Tuesday. Frank will not be present. This one’s for the two of you.

DINNER FOR TWO • CURATED EVENING • FRANK-FREE

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The Atmosphere

Set the Scene

Every Porch Pot experience is designed to feel like somewhere far away. Even if “somewhere” is technically within our ZIP code.

Warm candlelit spa setting
Relaxed spa ambiance
Evening outdoor atmosphere

“Candles. Mist. Possibly some frogs. Very atmospheric.”

Meet the Team Behind It
10/10 would recommend. Richard was amazing with his deep tissue massage but got a little handsy at the end. The bath was amazing and I felt fresh and renewed. Frank was an excellent greeter, would cum again💦.

Lo

Good Questions

Frequently Asked Questions

We understand you may have concerns. We’ve tried to address the most pressing ones below. Frank reviewed this page and had no notes.

Is this a real business?

Yes. We have a website. We have a logo. We have a dog on staff who takes her responsibilities very seriously. By every reasonable metric, this is a real business.

Is Frank a real dog?

Deeply, irreversibly real. Frank is a certified Good Boy with years of experience in emotional support, half-eaten snack retrieval, and greeting guests with unhinged enthusiasm. He also enjoys barking at the TV.

How do I book a package?

Packages are currently sold out, by design. If you’re the intended guest, check your email for your personal invite link. If you’re anyone else, you’re welcome to submit a special request via the contact form. We will review it with our full team of two (plus Frank).

Where exactly is the “facility”?

Our world-class facility is located in a confidential residential address. All experiences take place in or around the greater local area. Transportation is the guest’s responsibility, though we will absolutely walk you to your car.

What if I have dietary restrictions?

Sorry, but we don’t really care. Our adventures are that, adventures, so prepare your anus.

Ready for your Porch Pot Experience?

Check your email for your personal invite link—or browse our packages below.

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